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Gennhaver
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Name: gennhaver
Gender: Female
Interests: Paint. Obsessions. Anime [drooooool]. Pretty girls. Collar bones. Geeky boys. Zines. Clothes.. the lack thereof. You know, the usual.
Expertise: Necks. Tight corsets. Sephiroth. Paint. Sketches. Books.
Occupation: Military
Industry: Banking/Finance
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
7/29/2003
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| Free contest, win prizes, no purchase necessary at the Blogging Make Money Blog, Linkmoney.org.
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| So a bunch of people are meeting today in the Cesar Chavez park tonight to protest against the taxes Obama plans to raise according to the facebook invite that was sent to me). I was invited by a very VERY Christian student from my school. The slogan for this gathering seems to be "keep the government out of our lives," which I thought was a little silly. Just a few weeks ago this same student wrote a few posts writing about how birth control and abortion should be illegal. Then he wrote another post about how voting for prop 8 (a law that prevents gays from getting married in California for those of you who don't know) was the right thing to do, because by preventing gays from getting married was "for their own good" and we are "saving them in front of God's eyes" (paraphrase). I noticed that many of the people attending the protest were of the same mind, in terms of abortion and gay rights.
How silly is it that the people screaming the loudest about getting the governments "out of our lives" are also the people screaming the loudest about demanding government intervention on these other issues? So, the government better keep its dirty hands off our money but it can go ahead and grope our medical and marraige rights. I won't even talk about abortion or gay rights because let's be honest, you've all heard it all before... but the idea that birth control (oral/medical contraceptives, condoms not included) kind of baffles me - if only because birth control is used for a whole array of things OTHER than preventin the baby-makin.
For example, i use birth control because I have ovarian cysts that were fairly painful, the use of birthcontrol regulates my hormones to manage the cysts and prevent me from having to undergo multiple potentially dangerous surgeries to remove them. By taking my daily pill, I reduce the risk of damage to my ovaries - making it easier for me to conceive later in life should I choose to. HOW STRANGE! Taking birth control so that I CAN have babies! I wonder if the fundamentalists think of THAT when they go on their anti-pill rages. Probably not. A friend of mine doesn't get her period at all. She thought it was because she's an athlete but a trip to the doctor englightened her: she doesn't produce the correct hormones to get her cycles going! The doctor informed her that it was a good thing she caught it early on. If she had gone through life without ever getting her period, her body wouldn't be used to goin through the cycles by the time she was ready to conceive, her ovaries might be dysfunctional due to years of disuses. He immediately prescribed birthcontrol to her to help her body go through its natural cycles. Another instance of taking birth control to ALLOW conception later in life. Go figure.
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| "You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there." — Bob Marley
Am considering deleting this blog, haven't been able to write with any substance for a while now. I wonder what happened to the days when I could regurgitate all my feelings into these neat little white text boxes. It's become startlingly difficult to keep what I want to say truthful and open. Guess this is how it goes with a non-anonymous blog?
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| Water, over time, can wear away and even break apart the toughest of stones. All it takes is a single, tiny crack. Water seeps into the crevice and freezes, widening the crack just a little. This process is repeated over and over again until that crack becomes a canyon and the stone is severed forever. I feel like I’m cracking. Your memory has been seeping into my being and wearing me down bit by bit. This time of year is hard for me, I can't keep myself from coming apart at the seams. It started out as an ache and suddenly I’m broken, I’ve fallen apart and I didn’t even notice until I’d become nothing more than a few shattered pieces.
It seems so silly, when we last spoke you were missing me, and I was busy forgetting you. You told me that I was the only person you ever regretted losing. I reminded you that you didn’t lose me, you gave me up. There’s a difference. And now I’m the one that’s forgotten, and you’re the one being missed. You'll never be able to remember me again. I’ve lost you in the ultimate sense of the word. When I was lost, I was still always a phone call away. You’re a séance and a few lit incense away. It’s not the same. I thought I was done chasing you. Why am I always the one chasing you when it matters the most?
I feel sad, heavy, full of all that dangerous water that’s filling me up and pushing at the perimeter of my sanity. I’m suffocating in my own body, I’m drowning in your past and I can’t seem to reach my future. I’ve lost you in the most permanent way and all I want to say is sorry. I’m sorry. The sadness is overwhelming, being around the people that make me happy doesn’t even help anymore. What can you do, when faced with a mistake you can never undo? There’s no sorry, there’s no making up, there’s just this. This isn’t enough. | | |
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